Saturday, January 17, 2009

Blicky Unearths Rare Fragments of Historical Farewell Addresses

Try as I might to keep from hearing the farewell speech by a certain president, who shall-not-be-named in order to avoid offending any of my gentle readers numbering among the 22% who still feel like he did a bang-up job; a few radio borne snippets managed to float through the airwaves.

When I heard it, however, I was really relieved to know that things are a lot better than I had feared. Afghanistan actually sounds awesome. I was even thinking it would be a great place to raise my girls, now that women are so free and the country so democratic. I guess things are going really well in Iraq too. I had been concerned that maybe we shouldn't have done it, but it sounds like things are awesome there too.

The speech got Blicky thinking about historical figures and the legacy they leave behind, so over the course of months of exhaustive and tireless research he unearthed a treasure trove of new documents the existence of which scholars have hitherto remained ignorant...until now.

Fragment from an early draft of George Washington's farewell address:
We are seeing the peaceful birth of a new, peace-loving democracy in France. Reports of Robespierre eating Louis XVI's liver, sharpening the guillotine with puppies and orphans, and using the court dwarf for jousting practice have been wildly exaggerated by enemies of American freedom. Slavery in our new land is beginning to fade away gradually, and our indian brethren are coexisting peacefully with American patriots across the Great Plains.


Xerxes' Farewell Address: Our last campaign against the Athenians was a huge success thanks to the bravery of our military heros like Turgot the Meek and Hargip the Bewildered who sacrificed their comely wives to me and then lay down their lives for this great Persian empire.
The Farewell Address of Emperor Titus Flavius Sabinus Vespasianus: Our response to the destruction in Pompeii and Herculanium was immediate and well executed thanks to the efforts of Brunicus. Heck of a job, Brunicus!

The Farewell Address of Napoleon: Some may not have agreed that I should have attacked Wellington and von Bl├╝cher while they were assembled near the northeastern border of France but leaders are often called upon to make difficult decisions and I think history will look back upon Waterloo as the beginning of the end for the Seventh Coalition.

George Washington's Farewell Address, co-authored incidentally with Alexander Hamilton, was first published in 1796. The Address is read aloud every year in the US Senate. In anticipation of the inaugural festivities at Muse Swings, here's some of what Washington had to teach us about partisan politics and the usurpation of power by any one group:

"I have already intimated to you the danger of parties in the state, with particular reference to the founding of them on geographical discriminations. Let me now take a more comprehensive view, and warn you in the most solemn manner against the baneful effects of the spirit of party, generally.

This spirit, unfortunately, is inseparable from our nature, having its root in the strongest passions of the human mind. It exists under different shapes in all governments, more or less stifled, controlled, or repressed; but, in those of the popular form, it is seen in its greatest rankness, and is truly their worst enemy.

The alternate domination of one faction over another, sharpened by the spirit of revenge, natural to party dissension, which in different ages and countries has perpetrated the most horrid enormities, is itself a frightful despotism. But this leads at length to a more formal and permanent despotism. The disorders and miseries, which result, gradually incline the minds of men to seek security and repose in the absolute power of an individual; and sooner or later the chief of some prevailing faction, more able or more fortunate than his competitors, turns this disposition to the purposes of his own elevation, on the ruins of Public Liberty.

Without looking forward to an extremity of this kind, (which nevertheless ought not to be entirely out of sight,) the common and continual mischiefs of the spirit of party are sufficient to make it the interest and duty of a wise people to discourage and restrain it.

It serves always to distract the Public Councils, and enfeeble the Public Administration. It agitates the Community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms; kindles the animosity of one part against another, foments occasionally riot and insurrection. It opens the door to foreign influence and corruption, which find a facilitated access to the government itself through the channels of party passions. Thus the policy and the will of one country are subjected to the policy and will of another.

There is an opinion, that parties in free countries are useful checks upon the administration of the Government, and serve to keep alive the spirit of Liberty. This within certain limits is probably true; and in Governments of a Monarchical cast, Patriotism may look with indulgence, if not with favor, upon the spirit of party. But in those of the popular character, in Governments purely elective, it is a spirit not to be encouraged. From their natural tendency, it is certain there will always be enough of that spirit for every salutary purpose. And, there being constant danger of excess, the effort ought to be, by force of public opinion, to mitigate and assuage it. A fire not to be quenched, it demands a uniform vigilance to prevent its bursting into a flame, lest, instead of warming, it should consume.

It is important, likewise, that the habits of thinking in a free country should inspire caution, in those intrusted with its administration, to confine themselves within their respective constitutional spheres, avoiding in the exercise of the powers of one department to encroach upon another. The spirit of encroachment tends to consolidate the powers of all the departments in one, and thus to create, whatever the form of government, a real despotism. A just estimate of that love of power, and proneness to abuse it, which predominates in the human heart, is sufficient to satisfy us of the truth of this position. The necessity of reciprocal checks in the exercise of political power, by dividing and distributing it into different depositories, and constituting each the Guardian of the Public Weal against invasions by the others, has been evinced by experiments ancient and modern; some of them in our country and under our own eyes. To preserve them must be as necessary as to institute them. If, in the opinion of the people, the distribution or modification of the constitutional powers be in any particular wrong, let it be corrected by an amendment in the way, which the constitution designates. But let there be no change by usurpation; for, though this, in one instance, may be the instrument of good, it is the customary weapon by which free governments are destroyed. The precedent must always greatly overbalance in permanent evil any partial or transient benefit, which the use can at any time yield."


Word.


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80 comments:

*mary* said...

"Heck of a job, Brunicus!" Bwahahahahaha! The entire post was brilliantly done, but I'm a sucker for great Zing!

Heather said...

Love the cat drawings.

I too may want to raise my daughter in Afghanistan!!!

Great post.

unfinishedrambler said...

Very nicely done. That part about the parties, though, unfortunately, isn't possible in this day and age of the media ramping up everything. I'm just glad we don't have cable or satellite.

The Self-Deprechaun said...

This was smart and fresh. Let's hope for a better tomorrow and I hope they put Obama in a kevlar suit and a bullet proof box. Better yet, just have a hologram of him for Tuesday.

Fare thee well Dubs!

Aoi said...

Great farewell addresses. Wonder what Nero, Vlad the Impaler, of Ghengis Khan said.

steviewren said...

And that's why they say: "Father knows best." I only wish the children had listened.

Poetikat said...

Quite a lot of posthumous eating of words, I'd imagine (and grave-spinning, I dare say).
Puppies and orphans?!?!?!?!

I snapped off the Wizard of Odds in mid-sentence, and took great delight in so doing.

Kat

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

So Bush was just as good as Napoleon? Then why are we all complaining?


I didn't know the farewell address was read aloud every year. (And by their behavior, they must be playing on their Blackberrys during the reading of it.)

Blicky Kitty said...

Thanks Mary!
Heather, thanks for stopping by!
Thanks Rambler, don't watch it either but it sneaks in on npr. :)
SD my only concern with the hologram technology is that he might fall in love with another hologram named Melody and the press would have a field day (Does that count as a shout out to my geek peeps?)
Aoi feel free to have a crack at theirs. You might unearth some of your own!
Yes I agree Steviewren!
That's what I should have done instead Kat!
Margaret I think to be fair some of them might have been picking their noses.

Jeanne said...

Great post! Whenever I hear the Current Occupant, or his evil minion VP, talk about what the Founding Fathers would have wanted, it strikes that the two of them were what the original guys truly feared.

MuseSwings said...

Love that live shot you got of Pompeii! Brilliant. George? hasn't he moved out yet? I sent him a couple of crates and a U-Haul to expedite things!

Marvel Goose said...

That was just brilliant. I especially like the illustration of Napoleon. It fit the text purrfectly.

Blicky Kitty said...

I couldn't agree more jeanne. :)

Cynthia maybe I should just go down there and help the man pack. I'm sure he has plenty of volunteers though.

Thanks MG. He has a great site everyone! You can't find it from Marvel's Goose's profile but the link for the Daily Egg is on my blogroll.

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